The Noodists Advance - Soul Devastated

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February 4, In the Year of The Light 903


I am exhausted, lonely, and depressed. We have been only hours yet here surrounded by the beauty and terror that is this Pandemonium Fortress. This place is the gateway between Earth and Hell, staying the forces of evil from spewing into the world of men. Alex, Wystral, Ancient, Zak, Howsit, and I spread out under the columns after we emerged from the portal from Mephisto’s defeat. Numsay, without a word, sat next to me against the back wall, and leaning her head on my shoulder, rested, occasionally snuggling closer. I put my arm around her and felt shame and guilt over the arousal that consumed me. God she was so beautiful, as all the women of our party are. They are all strong, brave, and selfless – each would be the kind of companion any man would treasure. Yet I am conflicted, my heart was stolen in the Rogues Camp so long ago and now it is betrayed. She can bear no fault, she has no ill-intention – I know this. One thing I have learned is that the heart chooses, and we have little power to influence the choice. Yet this gives me no comfort. Meno, if you could but feel the power of my love you would be swayed – yet alas no. It would make no difference, as her love for him would entertain no usurpers.

We split up into bands of 7 or 8 before we left the docks of Kurast, what seems ages ago. This was the strategy, as Alex felt that he could not risk all to fall together, as one group must, and would surely succeed in reaching Diablo and Mephisto. As it happened, my group was the first, the battle raged, Mephisto fell and Diablo escaped. Shortly after we came here to the fortress through the portal, the other groups began to appear. Bloodied and exhausted as we were from their battles in the jungles. Meno stepped through and my spirits soared, but she turned to greet the new barbarian, Justa, who came through behind her. She fell into his arms at the portal. As they embraced there, he looked at me with an expression of apologetic defiance, as I sat there with Numsay. They turned away together and he led Meno away to a quiet corner where they sat together.

I am crushed. My spirit has fled my heart. I have not the desire to continue this conflict to save a world that I should live in without her.

Numsay, the wondrous creature that she is, had seen. She stirred, kissed my cheek and whispered to me, “Lycis, you are the kindest, most selfless man I have ever met. You are greatly desirable and my heart beats hard in my chest when I look at you. Meno’s heart has chosen and nothing you can do will change that. You are still the same kind, strong, and brave man that you were when her attentions included you. You have not changed, and nothing you have done has influenced this circumstance. I have admired you from afar for many days now, your quiet and innocent strength harder to resist with each passing day. That moment, today at the entrance to the Kurast sewers, has defeated my inhibitions and I must share with you now my heart.”

Numsay’s words still echo in my mind but my soul is devastated. It is difficult to focus on anything outside of my misery. Yet I am resolved to let go. The short beauty of the moments Meno and I shared will be with me forever as a quiet refreshing pool I may drink from in times of spiritual and emotional thirst. She is gone, I love her still!

Alex, Wystral and Half are talking quietly to Cain and Tyrael. I know we will soon be moving into Hell to seek Diablo. Numsay is here close, Zak and Naked Fist are resting near. Texvix and Ancient are asleep together. Texvix is changed. Just as I was loosing Meno, she was reunited with Ancient. The pain that once shown so plainly in her eyes has diminished. She is clearly happy and content to be near him. Sinfully is there sitting close to Half. They no longer try to hide their affection for each other, but they have yet to disappear together as others have done at times. Sinfully’s sister Sin is there near as well, but she has seemed more troubled lately as the Druids and the Amazons seem to have developed a closer bond. Watching my friends resting together, sharing the kindred that has bonded us together, is comforting.

The distant shrieks and moans from Hell beyond the stairs of the fortress is reminder that we are all maybe moments away from redemption. We will all together, very soon descend the depths into Hell and press forward the battle and the war. Should I fall to the evil beyond these walls, I pray that I be accepted and judged fairly by the creator, that I be remembered by my friends here as a brave and selfless warrior, and that Meno will not forget my name.